Gearing Up for Single Parenting
All you have to do is look at the statics. Becoming a single parent is inevitable for many parents.
Ideally, raising a child involves a full time mother and father, since each bring different strengths and therefore a broader way of attending to the different needs of the child. But when circumstances exist that make it impossible to keep the nuclear family intact, then it’s better to become a single parent than to sacrifice your emotional and/or physical health; and that of your child’s as well.
If you are thinking about separating from you child’s other parent, now is the time to start planning for life as a single parent. Making such monumental decisions without a plan can be a disaster. Planning for your future as a single parent helps to ensure that your child will grow up to be an independent and responsible human being despite having only one full time parent.
Where to start
Make a commitment to be an effective single parent. Realize, up front, that there will be pressures with work and financial responsibilities that will seem overwhelming at the time. However, outside pressure is not an excuse to water down your commitment to raising your child in a healthy, loving way.
Experts agree that the best single parents are the ones who attend to their own emotional needs first. This means maintaining a life that doesn’t completely revolve around the child and being a single parent. Children thrive in an environment where they feel safe, loved and cared for. If you haven’t taken responsibility and dealt with your own issues, you’re stuck in ‘victim’ mode. Children need the strength and guidance that only a parent can give them to develop a healthy way of relating to the world. and still Since there is a need for them to be strong for the child, it is a must that they have dealt with their own issues first. To do this, any single parent should be inspired to continue living despite being separated from the ones they have been with.
It is also a must for single parents to be motivated for this will keep them moving. Studies show that many adults become responsible single parents because they have motivated themselves to look for positive things that the situations brought them. It is believed that effective single parenting will follow once the parent mother or father was able to find his or her source of motivation in achieving goals that they have set not only for themselves but for the children as well.
For you to become an effective single parent, it is a must that you undergo lots of reflection and self-assessment to know what are your strengths and your weaknesses. If you know your strengths as a parent, your child will see that in you and will believe that you can take care of him or her even if you are alone. It is also a must to address your weaknesses for you to know what are the areas in parenting that should improve on. If you know your own weaknesses as a parent, you can turn these into opportunities that will make single parenting successful for you and for your child.
To those who are getting started in single parenting, the first thing that you need to do is to set your mind into it. If your mindset is that you would want to become an effective and sufficient parent for your child, raising a kid single-handed will be bliss for you.